Meet Viv Bibby

doing her hair

enlightening herself

exercising

running

Cellu-lite.

There's much fun to be had in a nightie
apart from the old "hugmetightie."
I'd suggest you keep clear of negligees
Sheer or you'll out-cellulite Aphrodite.

Downloading is fine in your nightie
and email and surfing both mighty
alt.Dress asks tonight
What I wear as I type
I lied and said " Lightly " politely .

There are those who drive out in their nightie
Late for school they'll run lights and do ninety.
But what worse than when
a policeman with pen
wipes his eyes and says,
"Great God Almighty".

I belonged to the newsgroup Alt. dress. One night we were asked what we were wearing . I often do computer work in my white cotton nightgown and find I am not the only one to do so.

Waist Land.

Lycra is the cruellest cloth.
Showing
Too much high-cut lilac buttock,
Soft flesh and bouncing spaniel breasts.
Bringing images of half-cooked spotted dick.

Cotton kept is covered, decent, dignified,
Was kind to forgettable figure, firestone thigh.
Left room for culinary high.

Lycra surprised us. Coming in the fitness boom
In violent power stretch geometric colour.
Tracksuits gave way to cling, shine and tight fit.
We worked out hard and long.
Often an hour or more.

In the cellulite-free mind our bodies
feel taut, toned and beautiful.
Blindly we choose Judas lycra
for bike pants, leotards, swim suits
body suits and stays.

1997 This was written after going to Opera for Breakfast in Courtenay Place , Wellington, where one of the Divas was wearing unbecoming lycra tights. I was studying T S Eliot at the time.

They won't stay up there

They won't stay up on the mantelpiece the
way I want them to.
It took all day to set them straight
now I don't know what to do.

Like Billy went to Africa
He's met the Lion King
Now he's back here as large as life
Teaching sand flies not to sting.

One at a time is lovely
One at a time is fine
I'm asking you quite nicely
My little children mine.

Graham says he's green and gay
Does he look green to you?
He always had a comical way
What do you think I should do ?.

Aren't they big and hairy ?
The way they clutter up the place
With quantum controversy
and talk of time and space.

One at a time is lovely
One at a time is fine
I'm asking you quite quietly
My little children mine.

Jo won't sit by Graham now
and Bob went straight to gaol
He didn't collect two hundred.
We're saving for the bail .

Billy says he didn't inhale
I'd like to think that's true.
So easy to forgive him
Tim says he's innocent too.

Why are they all so different
when I am just the same?
They throw their knickers on the floor
then tell me I'm to blame .

One at a time is lovely
One at a time is best
Please go back where you came from.
Let mother have a rest.

1999